Whenever things go wrong, we respond. Often, in our annoyance or hurt, none too skilfully. Sometimes, it’s not actually any of our business, and still, we meddle.
Do we have to try and solve everything, though?
When we hit a bump in the road, we either ride the rocky bit or steer around it. What we don’t do is to get out and berate the bump, or try and stomp it down. Unless our car is damaged, we continue our journey. Sure, we may cuss and curse a bit under our breath, but we don’t detour or allow it to run us off the road.
When change happens that we don’t like or want, we resist. We attempt to alter the present and future, and rail against the intractability of the past. In short, we try and wriggle out of our situation as soon as we can.
This isn’t always the most helpful or comfortable approach, however. Sometimes, the very thing we need to do is just sit with it. Some things have a way of working themselves out. The best response might be no response. Both outwardly and inwardly. Patient perseverance is much easier on us than ranting and raving and upsetting ourselves and those around us.
The same applies to any inner change that we are attempting to make. Time and again, we will trip up. We need to offer ourselves a gentle hand and suffer in patient perseverance. This is the only way we will make any progress.
To realise that we are not in the driver’s seat can feel scary, but it’s so incredibly liberating. Such knowledge makes it easier to deal when things happen that we cannot control. As with last week’s Monday Musing on gratitude, the more we let go and appreciate what we have, the clearer our vision, and the more readily we’ll see solutions and ways forward.
In my house, I have a rule: if someone breaks something, I don’t get upset. Instead, I say, ‘As long as no-one gets hurt.’ Things, I can replace; people, not so much.
Good things come to those who wait. Much of life is like juggling balls in the air. If we get impatient and try and snatch one down out of turn, we’ll drop the ball. We have to remain patient until the right time comes for a ball or two to drop. Patience is the calm acceptance that life happens in a different order than the way you had in mind.
As the Dali Lama reminds us: Tolerance and patience should not be read as signs of weakness. They are signs of strength.
Patience is the companion of wisdom.
And wisdom is the companion of peace.
And peace is the companion of patience.
The eternal circle.
In the wise words of Zen:
‘A moment of patience in a moment of anger saves a thousand moments of regret.’
If you’ve missed my previous Monday Musings, you can find the links here: https://www.harmonykent.co.uk/category/monday-musings/ 🙂